Wednesday, February 2, 2011

Body Sprays, Hospitals, and Xeroform


Have you ever noticed that smells fill so much more than our nostrils? Yesterday I was rummaging around in my bathroom drawer and I came across some leftover body spray I used last summer. I sprayed a puff into the air and took a deep breath. After coughing from the fumes, my mind drifted back to the apartment we lived in while our house was being built.

I remembered lazy days at the pool (okay – I wish they were lazy, but I quickly remembered that I was entertaining an-almost-three-year-old, so lazy isn’t exactly the word for it…).

I remembered peaceful nights sipping wine. Wait, no I don’t. We were building a house and living out of boxes in a confined space!

I remembered summer days of no worries. Wait. We were going through fertility treatments. Worry is the only thing we did.

So, I can’t help but wonder – do our minds block out the bad stuff so at first glance (or wiff), we only remember the good? Is this a personality trait some of us are blessed with or is it a subconscious choice we make? Either way, I’m glad I remember the good and the bad comes back only if I let it.

So that brings me to present day. Will the smell of a hospital bring about pictures of Rich tied down in a bed, or will it remind me of the outpouring of love I felt during my lowest time? Will the scent of Xeroform pads remind me of late night dressing changes or Dr. Annessa assisting me? I have a feeling it might be a little of both. And that’s okay.