Everything

Everything in our lives revolves around That Day. Looking back at the time he was in the hospital, I knew that our lives would be different, but I never could have imagined to what extent.  How do you predict the unknown? Should you even waste your time straining to see into the future when God only knows what's in store for you?

I think about the little things that have changed - the landscaping rock instead of the more earthy, more maintenance-heavy mulch that Rich prefers.     Or that fact that me, an avid high-heel-wearer (I even got a high-heel Christmas ornament from my fifth graders one year), have not worn a pair since the accident.  It's hard to haul things in heels.   Which, by the way, means that my pants are hemmed shorter to accommodate my new footwear (thank God ballet flats are en vogue!).  Sometimes it's not even the big things that get to you - it's all the little things.

And yet, life is good.  I'm sitting in our screened-in porch, listening to the birds sing.  Rich and Annessa are snoring softly in the bedroom and I am about to get a cup of coffee.  I find myself waiting.  Waiting for everything to be normal.  Waiting to create new memories so that it doesn't hurt so much to look back at the old ones.  Take new pictures. Celebrate holidays. Get through all the seasons. 

The beautiful part is we have each other.  That is so much better than the other alternative.  We get to make new memories.  We get to take new pictures.  We get to celebrate holidays and watch the seasons pass. 

And that is everything I need.

The Little Things About You That I Love

There are so many things I love about you.  Everyday you do or say something, or I discover something new about you that I adore.  So, here's what I am loving about you at the moment:

* Our dance parties - we grab wooden spoons from the kitchen and prance around the house like nobody's business to our favorite songs: "Hey Soul Sista," "Stuck Like Glue," and "Lover Lover (you don't treat me no good no more!)."  Sometimes I even catch you singing the words (as best as you can) under your breath in your room or in the car. If anyone ever saw us they would think we've lost our minds!

*The way you say "mible" for pimple and "snunk" for skunk. I don't have the heart to correct you and daddy and I make you say it all the time - "Annessa, what's that on your face?" "It's a MIBLE!  I already told you - stop asking me that!"

*The time I overheard you looking out our bedroom window, thanking God for the flowers in our woods and asking Him for some more. So sweet. 

*You HAVE to make silly faces with daddy as we pull out of the garage in the morning otherwise it's a BBBAAADDDD ride to Tammy's or school.

*You are so friendly - you always say goodbye to all of your friends.

*You ask an OBNOXIOUS amount of questions lately, but secretly, I like it because: #1, it means you're learning, and #2, you still think moms have all the answers. Why?  Why?  Why? - the "whys" never stop until I say, "Because that's just the way God made it."

*The "balls" you have - you ask Paige's mom for a snack all the time!  As if we don't feed you....

*The way you crawl in next to me every night.  Did you know I crawled in Mummie and Papa's bed in the early morning hours the day Dad and I got married?


I love you so much that sometimes it's hard to tell where I end and you begin.  It's true what they say - having a child is like watching your heart walk around on the street (do people say that, or  did I just make that up? I'm pretty sure that's what people say....).